On the same wave with the concept of my new project, own mindset, optimal circumstances and subliminal random quotes on my Facebook wall, I would like to share what I have come to terms with, in the last six months (more or less).
You can spend years and years in the same community thinking that you are happy. Not believing it but trying to convince yourself that your needs are weird and if everyone seems to get along just fine, then it’s your fault if you feel misunderstood. William Gibson has a good saying with regards to this.
Same goes with love under every form. If you kind of feel like you are not getting any, but as per agreement, you live in a situation where you are being verbally assured that you have plenty, you will eventually start believing it and treat your common sense like the odd crazy little dwarf messing with your head into believing something else.
Which reminds me about paranoia. Not the clinical one but the most relevant treat of one’s wrong lifestyle. While I agree that there might be serious issues with the chemical substances in your brain, causing it to see and interpret the reality with a splash of heavy black paint, in most of the cases, the environment you are living will be responsible for your heavy indigestion, known by its colloquial term – anxiety.
You get really used to it, although it feels everything but natural. You wake up cuddled by anxiety attacks, followed by a love – hate staring contest with your coffee machine and then, resigned, you fall into daily routine like the great disciplined tin soldier, that you are. Of course your life is good, if you have time to reflect upon abstract nonsense aka your soul.
Now, as it might not sound like rocket science, have you ever asked yourself with how many people you can actually communicate and what are the benefits involved?
Here is what I don’t mean:
- Social special skills that create a comfortable ambient
- Wearing a gorgeous mask that everybody adores
- Auto pilot
- Self sacrifice
- Silence treatment
- Stressing the pets or the walls, instead
Here is what I do mean:
- Eye to eye
- Real affection
- Willingness to listen
- Genuine interest
- Pure honesty
- Physical contact
- No expectations
- Deep feeling of peace as a result
- Distress side effects
- Random happiness oasis in your heart
- Urgent need to spread the love
- B E L O N G I N G
I really DO want to take responsibility for my words, so I urge everybody to start a real and worthwhile interaction test with whomever you feel that has a deep impact on your current life but also add a touch of adventure by trying it out with complete strangers. Take a mental skinny dip and if you hit concrete or quicksand on most of your attempts, take a look at the mirror and see how awesome you are (proof – you have read this as if you cared) and start packing before you can still breathe and can carry a suitcase full of good intentions and hope.
Please take the above with a grain of Himalayan salt. 😉
Ps: No, I haven’t figured it all out, but will keep you posted!