h23.00 still waiting for the super moon to show up above the Himalayas, as I don’t want to miss it. It seems to take forever, here.
10 days spent in Nepal count. I arrived here chased by the emotional intensity and alas pollution of almost 3 weeks spent in India… only to find out that Kathmandu is pretty much the same, hence the continuation of my cold and general feeling of tiredness.
I did not feel 100% in the last month but tried to always keep my senses alert and eyes open to grasp whatever I could from a land entirely different from mine.
I woke up each morning longing for familiarity and went to bed each night marvelled by what the day to day life had in store for me now. A continuous battle of high demand for rationality versus not losing the naif child’s heart that I battled so much to regain after years of what it felt inadequate or compromising.
Hard task when surrounded by poverty, starving animals, dusty roads, heavy air and constant contrast in between locals and foreigners getting on with their purpose.
What to make of all this? What can there be learned? Could it be just the ego’s battle to fit each piece into a puzzle without instructions? Shall I just settle with the observing silently and keeping the core strong so I can continue my journey unharmed by constant emotivity? Highly unrealistic to suggest that I haven’t felt lost most of the times or trying to figure out where this is all going. Same with the constant desire to make my presence agreeable and warm to each local that blessed me with a morning Namaste’ and disarming smile. Or all those kids coming from school, fending traffic, grownups and complicated fates.
“Hello”, “Where are you from” with a singing Nepalese accent, never sounded more beautiful or natural. Om mani pad me hum rising from cafes and restaurants early in the morning or late at night, added magic to an otherwise hyperrealistic hustle and bustle coming from the streets or perhaps my own heart. I shall never forget being accompanied by the community dogs in Nagarkot, who asked for food but were more than happy to just receive cuddles. What to say about the majestic mountains that made me dream about all the brave ones who dared to adventure to the base camp or even higher? And the girls smiling in the sun and chatting serenely in the rice terraces or under the shade of the pine trees?
At the end of the day and in the last hours remained before the next flight, it all somehow makes sense. I will go with one last attempt to catch a glance of the moon on the roof top and then to sleep hoping that they will not notice my emotional luggage at the check in tomorrow, as there are no money or wealth in this world that can pay for its fee.